Friday, April 29, 2011

Adjust your child's lifestyle if he or she has ADHD

Many people do not understand that ADHD children have special needs and that it is important to adjust your child's lifestyle if he or she has ADHD. If you are in this situation you will probably do just about anything to curb some of his or her behaviour that is not aligned with the family's values. Raising a child with this condition can be heart breaking as many of the child's impulses are going to leave you very heartsore at best. You will know what I am talking about if you are a parent of such a child.


Adjusting the diet is one area where you can get to work right away. Eating healthily and getting a lot of exercise are two areas that you can work on to help improve the situation. Exercising helps to reduce the negative symptoms of ADHD. Please do keep in mind that these children have many incredible qualities and gifts and are therefore very special in every sense of the word.



By engaging your child in a physical exercise regime, you are going to help her by boosting the serotonin, norepinephrine and dopamine levels. All of these SRI's are responsible for controlling focus and attention. Exercise is a much safer and better way to control the SRI's than ritalin is. Ritalin has some terrible long term side effects that you do not want your child to endure.

Your child's mood will be elevated significantly, depression will be reduced, motivation becomes better and stress levels reduce significantly. You will notice that the impulsiveness and hyperactivity will diminish drastically as well. All of these positive changes will help your child to sleep much better. Sleeping well at night is also very good for children who experience ADHD.

Walking 3-4 times per week for 30 minutes will be a great start. Adding any other kind of formal exercise will only improve matters even further. In time you should strive for your child to exercise every day for optimum benefit.

As all children and especially children with ADHD get bored quickly, it is important to find some form of exercise that will be fun for your child. Skateboarding, dancing, karate, judo or gymnastics are the kinds of exercise that should keep your child enthusiastic for a while. Team sports work well as the social element is also very beneficial for these children.


Take your child out to experience nature as it has been proven that this helps to reduce the symptoms of ADHD in both children and adults alike. Trail running and hiking are both an incredible way of getting fit and improving brain function.

Diet helps to improve the mood and energy levels. Many children who experience ADHD do not eat regularly nor do they eat correctly. When they are hungry they will rush in and raid the fridge and gorge on anything that is nearby. For this reason it is important to try and keep only healthy foods and snacks in the house. Regular mealtimes with healthy food are critical if you want sanity to prevail in your home.

Foods that contain omega -3 fatty acids are ideal for ADHD people. You should try to take supplements that have a ratio of 3:1 EPA to DHA. Regular meals with snacks that are spaced three hours apart are also very handy. Give your child a multivitamin tablet that contains magnesium, iron and zinc and also give them foods that contain these minerals. Each meal should contain some protein and complex carbohydrates. This combination will help to keep your child more alert and reduce the hyperactivity.

Getting back to the omega 3's, you can find these in milk products, tuna, salmon and certian fortified eggs. Adding fish oil supplements to this regime will do wonders for your child and the general karma in the house. Sleep is very important and you should ensure that your child gets a good night's rest every night. If he or she is grumpy and sluggish in the mornings then you can take this as sign that he or she is not sleeping well at night. Get your child to bed at the same time every night and avoid caffeine in any form later on in the day. You should not let your child take any daytime naps as this will disrupt the sleep at night.

In conclusion, it is easy to see that making a few subtle changes can do wonders. Stick to your guns and you will see results. Above all, no matter what your child’s behavior is like as a result of the ADHD, remember he or she did not ask to be born, you asked for the child to be born. Give your child all the love that you can coupled with these lifestyle changes.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Introducing Our New Expert Contributor

I just realized that I could never have done this thing alone.

Much as I love my little angel (yes, she's very good today), her and I would never have survived a month on our own. Her Daddy Dearest has played a huge role in both our survival and retaining some semblance of sanity. Admittedly, there's very little left, but hey, it's better than nothing.

My Crazy Family FLTR: My lil boy JR, my angel Debbie and My Handsome Hubby Wade
So the expert I'm going to introduce to you today, is none other than my Gorgeous, Loving Husband and Super-Daddy to my kids, Wade Balsdon.

Not only will his contributions help us understand the male psyche of the ADHD Dad, but it will also aim to help create an awareness of the condition amongst other dads, many of whom think that it's a make-up condition from moms who want to mollycoddle their kiddies. So ladies, bring on the men in your lives and show them that real men also do ADHD! :-)

Monday, April 25, 2011

Loving a narcissistic ADHD kid

No, I am not going to give you advice today, because I don't actually know how to show love to a child who rejects your love.

See, that's another thing with ADHD children - particularly those that are impulsive. When they are ruled by impulse, they tend to live in the moment. Do something nice for them and they will adore you, until something or someone else comes along. They will chew you and spit you out in a million pieces. Sounds harsh, but that's the reality - impulsive ADHD kids are a bit more narcissistic than most.

I never thought I'd utter the paragraph above. I was disgusted when someone said to me that all kids are narcissistic, because they live for the joy of the moment. And of course kids do live for the moment - that's what childhood is all about. But if your kids are narcissistic (and that person's kids were for sure), leave mine be thankyouverymuch....

Okay, so let me contradict myself. Most kids are NOT narcissistic, they just do what they enjoy, because their natural instinct is telling them that a life of stressing and working hard to pay the bills awaits when they grow up. Remember when your mom said "Be a child for as long as you can"? - well, that's what they are doing. They deserve it. They have no responsibilities and they are enjoying that freedom too for as long as they can. I would do that too if I could.

Living in a resort town, my kids get to meet lots of other kids and they have taken a liking to a specific family. When the Joneses* are here, I don't see my kids. When they are not off to the beach, they are out for milkshakes or playing games at the Joneses house.  I like them - they are nice people, very kind, loving and strict. I want my kids to enjoy every second with them.

However, since the Joneses have a whole football team, it means that my kids can't park off there for the entire 10 days that they are here. My daughter has to come home for meals and to sleep here. With that comes the responsibilities of keeping the home inhabitable and treating the family with some semblance of human dignity - both things that she seems unable to do.

Yes, I'm talking about my lovely little girl who can't give us enough love the rest of the time. The same little girl who does so well at school and helping around the home. And no - it's not just normal kid behavior. My son also loves the Joneses. He wants to go play before he opens his eyes in the morning, but he does his duties, eats his meals in peace and gives him mom a (reluctant, just to keep the peace) kiss and hug before he leaves.

I wonder if it is a wall she builds? Perhaps she wants to cause as much friction as she can before she leaves, so that she doesn't miss us too much while she is out?

For us as parents, it is sad and heartbreaking. We want this little girl to be happy. We want to make her happy, but she doesn't seem to want our love. It's not the Jones kids' influence- they would not dare talk to their parents like that. With other kids she seems able to hold her composure and maintain the balance between home and play.

No matter what it is, we will love her and talk her through this. This too shall pass...

How Minerals Can Combat the Symptoms of ADHD


Today, conditions such as ADHD are being diagnosed at a more frequent rate than ever before. One of the reasons is that in years gone by people were less aware of the condition than they are today. Some parents are a little vague as to how they manage their children who have ADHD. Many of the parents will turn to the nearest drug available simply to calm the children down.


Other parents are starting to realize that this is not the route to take and are now starting to seek healthier alternatives for their children. A good start in this regard would be to address the magnesium intake of the children. In years gone by, people were able to get sufficient amounts of magnesium, however today this has changed.

Children are prone to much more stress today than was the case 50-60 years ago. Peer pressure, pressure to perform well academically and on the sports field is more evident now than ever before.

Children who have ADHD are less able to deal with and manage these stresses than other children are.

Media, music and negative images play a role in causing additional stresses for all children, although ADHD children are affected more by the stresses.

These kinds of stresses causes the body to be drained of magnesium due to the adrenaline release in the body. Magnesium is necessary for the release of adrenaline from the body. As magnesium is helpful in calming people down, children who face these stresses will need to take sufficient amounts of magnesium.

Bad nutrition is also very responsible for robbing people of magnesium and this is especially the case with ADHD children.Processed foods strip the body of magnesium for a couple of reasons. Processed foods contain very little magnesium and are therefore useless in terms of providing magnesium. The other reason is that the food additives and refined sugars that are contained in processed foods cause people to be stressed and this as we know, stress causes the body to be depleted of magnesium.

Parents who have ADHD children should do their best to take processed foods out of their children's diets.

Junk foods are an absolute no go zone for children with ADHD. These children are hyperactive enough without adding to it by giving them foods that will only exacerbate the condition. Parents who make these changes in their children's diets will notice a marked improvement in the behaviour of their ADHD children.

Once the junk food has been replaced with nutritious alternatives the children will be well on their way towards living a much more balanced life with regards to the ADHD.

Magnesium is beneficial in that it helps to calm the mind down. The brain utilizes magnesium to send messages through the nervous system to the various parts of the body. Magnesium is great for the purposes of calming the mind down as well. ADHD children will therefore benefit from this as they are already way too active. ADHD children who are calmer are better able to focus and function on important matters such as school. Serotonin is produced in the body courtesy of magnesium and serotonin is helpful in creating a sense of well being. People who have low levels of serotonin are often found to be depressed, moody or irritable.


When people get sufficient amounts of magnesium in  their bodies, their bodies will relax as well. Magnesium works on the muscle fibers within the body. It is common for people who are magnesium deficient to experience twitches and spasms.

ADHD children can ill afford this added disturbance and this highlights the need for adequate magnesium intake.

Magnesium offers so many other benefits that one could write a book on the benefits of this great mineral.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

I will survive - Homeschool Edition

Someone posted this on Facebook and I simply LOVED it!




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rIOogqa-5GA
I WILL SURVIVE (THE FIRST YEAR OF HOMESCHOOLING)
First I was afraid
I was petrified.
Kept thinking I could never teach
'Cause I'm not certified.
But we spent so many nights
Reteaching homework that was wrong.
I grew strong,
so now I teach my kids at home!
We study math and outer space.
I just kept on despite the fear with a big smile across my face.
I bought a set of Base Ten blocks.
I bought books with answer keys.
My parents think we're nuts,
but they don't even bother me
Come on, let's go walk out the door.
We're on the road now,
'cause we're not home much anymore
My friends would laugh and say we'd be unsocialized.
I heard one mumble that I'd give up by July.
Oh no, not I!
I will survive!
As long as I know how to read
I know we'll be alright.
I've got all my life to learn.
I've got energy to burn.
and I'll survive.
I will survive.
It took all the strength I had not to fall apart.
Decided to attend a play date at the local park,
and I met oh so many moms who offered eagerly to help.
They used to cry.
Now they hold their heads up high,
and so do we!
My kids are cool!
They're not those chained up little people stuck inside at school.
So if you feel like dropping by and just expect us to be freeyou'd better call ahead first 'cause we're probably busy!
***Sung to the music "I Will Survive"
Original song:
Written by Freddie Perren and Dino Fekaris
First performed by Gloria Gaynor, October 1978
Homeschool lyrics written by Natalie Criss***

Video: Girl with Autism [HQ]

Videos Posted by Pat Boyle: Girl with Autism [HQ]

Bloggers Have More Influence on Purchases Than Celebrities, Study Says - FoxNews.com

This article is very interesting to those of you who want to sell things online.

Read the article and give me a shout - I'll gladly review your product or service!

Bloggers Have More Influence on Purchases Than Celebrities, Study Says - FoxNews.com


Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Study: ADHD Linked to Preterm Birth

Study: ADHD Linked to Preterm Birth

My kids were born at 38 weeks (twins). My son does not have ADHD and my daughter does.

Monday, April 18, 2011

What School Lunches Look Like In 20 Countries Around The World: Pics, Videos, Links, News

What School Lunches Look Like In 20 Countries Around The World: Pics, Videos, Links, News

Hmm...Food for thought!

I wonder what the ADHD rates look like in these countries?

Guess what came in the mail?

I forgot to tell you!

Today the proof copy of my book arrived in the mail!

Click here to check it out in more detail.

She has her moments...

My Precious Little Angel
Today was a strange day here on the coast.  The weather was the strangest. While our area is known to have only two seasons: Summer and SUMMER, it was cold today. However, seeing how my daughter is getting better everyday, adds a ray of sunshine to my every day.

Today she was a bit tired. That's what happens when I let them stay up late to watch a movie. But I had no choice - it was Spiderman 3 and Dad really worked hard to convince me. Generally, I have learned that you cannot cut her any slack. She has a tendency to turn good things into bad things.

But today the after-effects were limited only to some auditory integration issues and laziness. She did fall asleep during the movie, but she was still tired at school. When they watch a movie late (a rare treat) we let them lie in the next morning - one of the best reasons why homeschooling is perfect for ADHD children.

Today was the best that she'd handled a late night yet. She listened during lessons (in between a bit of fiddling, yawning and stretching - nothing too disruptive) , followed instructions and did her work well.

There was a small incident when the noise in the home got to her, but at least she didn't slam doors.

That's progress!!!

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Biomedical treatment - the difference

So my baby girl, Debbie (9) has been on biomedical treatments for about a month now and the results are amazing. Apart from improved behavior in general, she is able to remain focused for longer periods of time. She is also able to keep herself occupied, which she has never done - ever.

From birth she has been attached to me, almost literally. It's not like she could sit by me and play with her Barbies while I work, no no - she won't play unless I do too. So when I was unable to play with her because I had to work, she'll stand here hanging onto me until I could take it no longer. I mean I love my baby dearly, but we all need some space sometimes, you know!

When she went to creche, which she seemed to like, she'd come home crying and leave home crying. She would not go to sleep at night. Those were tiring times and still long before she was diagnosed. At this point the only diagnosis was that I was a bad mommy who spoiled her, letting her sleep on my chest for the first year of her life.

It became worse. Behavioral problems started to creep in - selfishness, lying and deceitfulness by the time she was 7. We still believe that a lot of this had to do with friends of hers at the time who coerced her into doing things that were out of character. Self-harm also started becoming a constant concern for us.

In the next two years it would spiral out of control completely. Sensory integration issues arose as did a total disinterest in anything related to the home,  family and school. Her school books look like a dog's breakfast, doors would slam when we type (bit difficult not to as we type for a living) and the sound of us eating could send her into a hysterical rage.

Most of these issues are resolved now after only a month on biomedical treatment and those that are not, have been improved tremendously. We look forward to the result of the biomedical treatment after 6 or so months.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Why People in Network Marketing Should Home School Their Kids

Network marketing and homeschooling combine well to offer a great vehicle for the family to spend time together. It can form the perfect opportunity to learn and travel together.
Network marketing or multi level marketing (MLM) as it is otherwise known is a great way for people to make some extra money. While many people join these companies just to make an extra five hundred dollars or so per month, many people will eventually gravitate towards this becoming a full-time career.

Certain MLM companies are really committed to the success of their distributors and will offer much training to this end. Some of the training even encompasses personal development and will give many distributors a new perspective on life and with this new perspective comes a different way of thinking.

Some companies have meetings on a weekly basis and some of them have more than one meeting per week. Apart from the training on how to do the business and the sharing of new sales skills, these companies will teach their distributors to want better lifestyles.

Often only one member of a couple will attend these meetings and this can be problematic for various reasons. The person attending the meetings is the only one being exposed to the positivity that emanates from these meetings. During this time, the other spouse remains exposed to the reality of life in terms of paying the bills and surviving each month. It is easy to get dragged down into reality and to lose one’s ability to be positive and visualize change.

As the distributor grows with this training and the remaining spouse is excluded, this can cause a split among the two. For this reason alone it is important that both members of the couple attend the training and both embrace what the other is trying to be achieved.

As the couple progresses through the trainings, they will start to understand the power of residual income and what it can do for them. For those who get it right in MLM there will come a time that they need never work again and the money will continue to pour in month after month. When this happens, the couple will have much time on their hands to do other more fun things than chasing money. While this sounds great, as the couple is able to go on holidays when they like and do a variety of other interesting things, having kids at a conventional school, presents a huge problem. The couple is unable come and go as they like when they have children still at school.

Some companies expect leaders to travel around the country and even abroad to train other distributors to become successful. Under normal circumstances, one of the couple will do this while the other stays at home. Business is important and life must go on. After four to five years of this, there will be a significant shift in the bond between the traveling parent and children and husband and wife.

While the one parent travels and enjoys the good times, the other is at home working to create a stable home for the kids. The parent at home is the hero there, while the other parent is recognized for the way he or she has helped to change people’s lives. When the traveling parent comes home, there is a loud crash to reality as the other partner has not been privy to that amount of excitement or positive energy. Again this highlights just why both husband and wife should be in this thing together.

Apart from the marital strive that is often part of an MLM-family’s fate; the children may suffer if both parents travel. If the children are indeed being home schooled, then this family can travel all they like as the children can go with the parents. While one parent is training and recruiting new distributors in other countries and towns, the other parent can be teaching the child or children. After school and when training has been completed, the family can go out on an educational excursion of that town or country. This surely presents a better option than most of the family staying at home while one parent flits around the world on their own having fun.

Children will also learn from a young age about the power of network marketing and will more than likely follow suit when they are old enough. Network marketing represents an alternative lifestyle and this alternative lifestyle should encompass all aspects of life including education. Parents in who decide to home school are able to teach their children so much more than they would ordinarily learn in a regular school environment. These are just some of the many reasons why people in network marketing should home school their kids.

Is Home School Best for ADD/ADHD?

Having a child with ADD/ADHD will no doubt leave parents burned out and frustrated. Receiving calls from teachers with complaints, when the parent is already confused, causes more stress on a child that feels lost in a world of their own. Is home school best for ADD/ADHD?
Parents who have children with ADD/ADHD may be asking themselves the question is home school best for ADD/ADHD? Public schools may be ill equipped in being able to provide the necessary environment to educate a child with this condition. Parents and children will have gone through much pain with all the meetings with the teachers regarding the poor performance of the child. Many people do not realize just how much a family can go through when they have a child with this condition attending a public school. At some point though they will come to the realization that enough is enough.

At this point parents will come to the realization that by home schooling the child they cannot do any worse than is currently the case. While this form of education is not for every family it can be very good for alleviating many serious problems for a child who is suffering from this condition. School systems generally are not geared to educate these kinds of children. This is especially the case when no diagnosis has been made and the teachers are of the opinion that the child is merely playing up in class in order to disrupt the class.

It is interesting to note that some very famous people were educated at home. While the list is exhaustive here are some of the very prominent people who were home schooled George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, Thomas Edison, Benjamin Franklin, Helen Keller, Agatha Christie, Leonardo Da Vinci. Parents can rest assured that their child is in good company. The Wright brothers who invented flying were also home schooled. This is great news as this is a small list of some very great people who have made some sizable contributions to mankind.

Parents who educate their children have an unwavering commitment to providing the best education possible for their children. With the resources available today this is more than possible. Connecting with other parents who do this is a must and this is especially in the case where their children have learning disabilities. The Internet provides a quick way to connect with other parents who will gladly share their experiences and may even need some moral support themselves.

Often children with ADD/ADHD are not that perky first thing in the morning as sleep disturbances are commonly observed with them. Going to regular school presents a problem for them, as they will be taught first thing in the morning when they are not at their best. Teaching them at home allows the flexibility to work around the child's situation and personal needs. As these children normally only start coming to life around ten am it would be best to start teaching them after that time.

Most importantly, due to the fact that these children are easily distracted, it is best to teach them at home in a quiet and relaxed environment. Parents are able to give short bursts of focused teaching to their children and this avoids the frustration that more than likely was the case in the classroom. Ask any home schooling parent and you will see that they have no doubt regarding the question whether home school best for ADD/ADHD children.

Does Homeschooling Mean Kids Have Free Reign?

Home schooling can be quite a daunting task for parents who start to educate their children at home. There are so many facets to this task and sometimes parents may not know where to begin. Parents should begin by trying to get all the information possible about home schooling. This can be done by getting hold of books or joining a home schooling group that can be used to gain information from. One of the very important considerations to make is what learning styles are going to be adopted in teaching the children.

There are three styles that can be used and these are visual, auditory and kinesthetic. Visual children learn best when they can see what is going on. Often these children will have what is loosely termed as a photographic memory. These children are able to memorize facts very well.

Auditory learner learns best by hearing information. They love to repeat what they hear and love reading out aloud as this helps them to learn best. Children like this like to talk a lot, as this is also a form of learning for them.

Kinesthetic learners learn by actually doing the work. Many of these children are quite active and may even experience difficulty in sitting still for long periods. It is possible that in time these children may evolve into the other two categories. It is generally felt that of all the learning styles most children fall into the kinesthetic category. Children love to do things more than they like to listen or look at things.

Parents should observe their children to ascertain which styles are best. This will be helpful in terms of organizing child directed learning. Parents will soon enough be able to see what method works best for the child. Eventually it will be quite evident as to which method the child responds to mostly.

One form of child directed learning is called unschooling. In this scenario children are allowed to find their own way in terms of discovering education. The child will also determine how he learns certain subjects. Often this is done in a way that is fun for the child. Thinking that unschooling is so relaxed that nothing is achieved should not confuse people. Unschooling is child directed while home schooling is parent directed.

While skeptics often frown upon unschooling, if it is done correctly it works very well. Parents can ask the child to set goals and then make sure that the goals are achieved. Provided reading, writing and arithmetic are taken care of then latitude can be given to the child. Christians who choose to go the route of child directed learning, will probably have to put the Bible on hold in terms of how they teach and discipline their children. In unschooling the child has a lot of free reign when it comes to education.

Are Special Needs Met at School?

Learners often present behavioral problems and this is when children’s emotional needs are especially important. Learners are unable to focus properly at school if they have other matters on their minds. Depression and anxiety can be emotionally crippling for children. Many things can cause this to happen such as parents who fight a lot or if the parents have financial problems. Some students may have lost a parent. The parents may be divorced and this too can be problematic. Bullying is another big cause for concern and it often goes unreported. Sadly, in many cases it results in suicides.

Most schools used to have programs in place whereby counseling were available for these children. However, economics is causing this support to be reduced drastically. Children can have other conditions such ADHD and these learners need special attention as well. In times where public school teachers are overworked and underpaid, with high student to teacher ratios, many conditions go unnoticed.

Parents should ensure that the school is equipped to deal with these matters, otherwise the student could grow up with less than the accepted levels of adequacy to deal with living in today's world. If the school is unable to cater for this, the parents should seek help independently for the child.

While there are a large percentage of children who need special attention, it begs the question whether schools are adequately equipped to deal with these matters. According to research at least twenty percent of learners at public schools are candidates for special attention. Most of these students have eating disorders, depression, autism or ADHD. A further fifty percent of students have less severe issues to deal with, but they are issues nevertheless.

While there is no doubt that schools do their very best to assist these students, one wonders if it enough.

Many parents choose to home school their children so that they can give their children the best possible start in life. Twenty to thirty years ago, school was very different to what it is like today. The worst kind of offense that was committed those days was truancy. Today there are so many horror stories about what goes on at schools and this must play on students’ minds to some extent. In light of this, many parents feel much more comfortable home schooling their children.

Students who have specific emotional needs are easier to deal with on a one on one basis. Parents are also much more motivated to give that much needed attention to their young ones. Parents will be able to quickly identify if there are any problem areas in the student’s life. Once this has been detected, the parents can seek professional help for the children.

Parents who are new to home schooling should try to connect with other home schooling parents. This is especially the case where children’s emotional needs are in question. Home schooling parents should be willing to network with each other. With the Internet at their disposal there are so many home schooling associations parents get in touch with where they can obtain support for themselves and their children.

The Validating Role of a Father

Since mothers give birth and are generally the nurturers in the family, we tend to discount the importance of a dad's role in the family. That is one of the few traditional roles that have stuck with us since the days when fathers were hunters and mothers gathered wood for the day's meal. Fathers were often absent and today still, this is often the case.
An absent dad adds pressure to a mother's already heavy load. Not only does she physically have to do everything, but she has to be there emotionally for her family too, not only as a mother but also as a father. No longer does she have to be the nurturer, but also the authoritarian. This can be rather confusing for the children and the confusion can easily spill over into their adult lives.
Many fathers are there physically, but they are not plugged into the children emotionally. This may cause bigger problems for a child that a father who is physically absent. Children with a disengaged dad tend to think that they are unimportant to their father or that they are burdening him. This can result in anxieties and insecurities and the children may never feel that they are good enought to live up to anyone's standards.
Parenting roles should be co-operative in the sense that a mother should instill values and the father should validate the mother's teachings. Children who experience this lack of validation often grow up to look for validation in the wrong relationships.
Validation is a stamp of approval that tells a child that they are loved and accepted unconditionally. They should be aware of the fact that they are an integral part of the family and that other members care about him or her. They want to know that they are loved unconditionally by their father.
The relationship a child shares with his or her father is an important one. If a father is absent, someone should fulfill that role to the best of his ability. A mother could always approach a family member, a friend of a youth pastor to give the child the validation he or she needs.
Men who grow up without a good example are often confused about how they too can be good fathers. This makes it difficult to be a good father to your own children.
Dealing with teenagers is particularly difficult, especially when there are behavioral issues at play. Children tend to act up instead of saying that they want more attention from their fathers.
There are many steps that can be taken by a father to validate his children. However, it also very simple. What you do does not really matter as much as ensuring that the child knows that he or she matters.


Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/5944409

Timeout Tips for ADHD Kids

Time-outs work effectively for most children, but it can be used with much success on children with ADHD. The purpose of timeouts for ADHD kids is not so much about punishment as it is to remove the child from a situation that is stressful or overstimulating. The fact that it is an immediate consequence is also helpful, as these children cannot always tie up an action that occurred earlier in the day with a consequence that is to occur much later.
A timeout should never be scary for the child. It should occur in a non-threatening environment. It is best to have an adult present, as ADHD kis tend to quickly find something to keep them occupied while they are in timeout. Instead of fiddling with their hair, toes or clothing, they should be encouraged to think about the reason why they were being put in timeout. For instance, if the child acted impulsively, she should be told to think about what prompted her to do that and the dangers of doing what she did.
Timeouts should be as long as the child is old in years. Nine year olds should sit in a corner with no distractions for 9 minutes.
A great alternative to corrective therapy in the corner, is a productive time out. An older child can be told to go to their desk and read for half an hour. Alternatively, they could do a quiet hobby or activity during that time. This will help him or her to relax and calm the senses that are overstimulated.
An ADHD child should have a bedroom with soft, solid colors and no clutter or other distractions. It should be a calming sanctuary for him or her.


Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/5837833

How to Change ADHD Behaviors

Any number of negative and socially unacceptable behaviors may be present in a child who has been diagnosed with ADHD. Parents may be under pressure to deal with all the symptoms right away and this causes a lot of stress. In fact, it adds to the stress of just keeping up with a child arguing when it is time to go sleep, not remaining seated when she needs to, oversensitive senses that cause anger outbursts, overstimulation and forgetfulness.
Of course, as a parent it is only natural to want to eradicate all the symptoms immediately and to have a well-behave and socially acceptable child in no time. However, this is bound to turn into disaster. When parents suddenly want to change everything about the child, she may feel victimized or bullied. This will result in resentment towards the parents and manifest in worse behavior. Worse behavior will bring about more change and punishment and so the vicious cycle continues.
Experts suggest that the parents target one or two behaviors to address at a time. One could choose the two most disruptive or destructive behaviors first and deal with those.
The parents should discuss the ways in which the behavior is affecting the child, the parents and the family as a whole and why it would be good to change it. Small steps could be put in place with the input of the child, to completely eradicate the problem over time.
As motivation, parents can offer a non-monetary reward for reaching the goal and fair, yet swift consequences for slipping back to the old behaviors. Once the behavior has been significantly reduced over a period of a week or so, a bigger reward should be given, such as allowing him or her to go to bed later one weekend night.
However, parents should take caution with the rewards. If the child constantly forgets to do homework and the behavior has improved, the reward should not be going out for an ice-cream during homework time. In that case the child should first do homework and then be taken out afterwards.
When ADHD kids are taken out of their routine, they tend to slip right back to the old behavior patterns.


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ADHD Secrets That Can Change Your Life Today

Every parent struggling with a child who is disruptive, distracted and disfocused, would like to obtain some ADHD secrets as to how they can improve their child's behavior.
Children who have been diagnosed with ADHD are likely to be more sensitive to negative attention. In fact, many of these children over-react severely to punishment or criticism. However, they crave positive feedback and this can be used as a secret weapon in any ADHD parent's arsenal of tools.
Parents can use selective attention to get the child to behave appropriately. Some experts suggest that inappropriate behavior be ignored all the time, no matter how hard and frustrating it may be for the parents.
However, the behavior can usually be stopped by distracting the child. When he or she settles down, they could be complimented on how well they are doing the task on which they are now focusing.
At first, this may take a bit of getting used to as it is the opposite of what we are used to doing. Most parents instinctively jump on bad behaviors immediately, trying to correct them in the hope that it will go away. However, this has the opposite effect with ADHD kids, as any attention is better than no attention for them.
On the flipside, positive behavior should be reinforced. This will teach the child that positive behavior brings about positive attention. Selective attention is one of many well-kept ADHD secrets that can bring about immediate change in a stressed out household.
Bonus tip: Catch your child doing something good at least 5 times every day and praise them about it. Be sincere about good behavior and do not praise for basic good behaviors. Brushing teeth and picking up toys are basics that they should do as part of their responsibilities. Praise them for 'extras' such as playing with their little brother without being asked, clearing the table after dinner and doing a good deed for someone else.


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Behavioral Therapy and Natural Remedies for ADD-ADHD


Behavioral therapy can be a helpful tool along with minerals and other natural remedies for ADD/ADHD. Natural therapies have been found to be helpful in relieving symptoms of hyperactivity and inattention. This in turn benefits the child holistically by improving his or her overall health.
Massage and yoga can help to relax the child and improve concentration. One on one attention is something that an ADD/ADHD child thrives on, even if it is only for thirty minutes a day. During this time the child should choose the activity and during this time, the focus should be on having fun only.
While most ADD/ADHD kids give up quickly when they are unable to perform a task perfectly first time around, they do like learning new things. When teaching him or her new skills, the parent should demonstrate how to perform the task. The demonstration should be accompanied by talking in a quiet voice, but making the explanations clear.
ADD/ADHD kids respond to audiovisual-sensory perceptions. It takes longer for the memory traces to form. Parents and teachers will often have to repeat instructions several times. It is important to be patient during this process as impatience will lead to the child being afraid to ask questions. If they don't ask they will mess up the task and feel like a failure.
The child is likely to become aggravated when he or she is struggling with a task. It is important for the parent to be aware and read the signs of an explosion that is approaching. When the signs are there, the parent should step in and divert it.
During an emotional storm or explosion, the child should gently be removed from the battle zone. A part of their bedroom could be turned into a special sanctuary with favorite soft furniture and things that make him or her happy. Beading, drawing and building models are some of the solitary activities into which an ADD/ADHD kid can escape.


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The Link Between ADHD and Divorce

Research has shown that married parents with a child suffering from ADHD are almost twice as likely to get divorced by the time the child reaches the age of eight than couples whose children are not afflicted by the disorder. While it is common knowledge that kids with the condition can place a lot of strain on the parents, the study shows that this stress is carried over into the marriage of the parents too. Parents will want the best for their children, but deal with it in different ways, which is one way in which arguments can occur.
The fact that one of the parents may be in denial, may be a large contributing factor. Some people still feel that ADHD is a fad, as it was not around thirty years ago. They may see the child as naughty when they forget, daydream or when they are unable to follow directions. The parent who is in denial may also feel that the other parent is mollycoddling the child.
Parents have to agree on ways to handle the situation. Arguments between the parents may result in the child's behavior becoming worse. This can create a viscous cycle as the child's behavior deteriorates and the arguments between the parents escalate. That is how 25% of families end up in the divorce court.
Co-existing conditions and disorders along with the ADHD can increase the likelihood of divorce, including conduct disorder or oppositional defiant disorder. If the ADHD is causing arguments between the parents, it is a red light that shows that professional help is needed. Letting the condition run its course while letting the marriage fail will not help anyone, least of all the child.


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Understanding the Links Between ADD/ADHD and Sensory Integration Disorder

Many frustrated parents are unaware of the similarities and the links between ADD/ADHD and Sensory Integration Disorder. In fact, many people have not yet heard of it. Sensory Integration Disorder is basically a condition whereby the brain is unable to fully utilize the information gathered through the senses in an effective, organized way.
Children with sensory integration disorder (SI) may have difficulty finding the right balance to react to information received. Sufferers tend to react in extremes to things such as touch, smells, sounds and tastes that other people take in their stride as part of their daily life.
A child with this condition will display extreme and anti-social behavior as the senses are experienced. The behavior could involve extreme emotional outbursts, crying, tantrums and more. Parents' first instinct is to assume that the child is trying to get attention through this behavior when in fact it is sensory integration disorder.
Kids with ADD/ADHD and SI disorder will display a number of other symptoms. Kids with hearing sensitivities will hear noises that other people do not hear, such as people chewing or breathing or other background noises.
Children with touch sensitivities will be indifferent to temperatures or pain. They will refuse to wear clothes made of certain fabrics or wear long sleeves even in summer to avoid skin showing. They may also avoid physical contact with other people. They are also likely to avoid grooming and any activities that involve touching their faces, hair or teeth. Kids with ADD/ADHD and SI may have very low or very high activity levels, spin things around and taking things apart.
The brain is unable to process and interpret information that is entering properly, which causes them to be unable to form a proper impression from the combined information of all the senses. Parents are likely to view the child's reaction as misbehavior, but the child suffering from ADD/ADHD and sensory integration disorder is probably very fearful and confused.


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Physical and Alternative Therapies for ADHD

Four and a half million American children aged between five and seventeen have been diagnosed with ADHD since 2006. The symptoms vary from one child to another and certain symptoms may be more pronounced in one child than it is in another child, depending on the type of ADHD that the child has. Generally, the symptoms could include overactivity, uncontrollable behavior, impulsivity, and the inability to remain focused.
Some medical doctors like to prescribe medications while naturopaths advocate natural remedies, such as mineral supplements that have proven helpful for the condition. In addition to any herbal or pharmaceutical medicines, research has shown that physical therapy can be very beneficial. It is suggested that parents exhaust all other options before settling for drugs.
Since there is a link between sensory integration disorder and ADHD, sensory integration is one of the therapies on offer to help improve hyperactivity, impulsiveness and restlessness. Strenuous exercise and deep pressure are some of the methods used. Research has shown that kids who receive sensory intervention therapy are better able to pay attention in noisy classrooms and generally more at ease.
The therapy will depend on the type of behavior which is most pronoounced. The exercise ball, swings and gentle or deep brushing of the skin are some of the most common therapies.
Occupational therapy is used to improve school performance by helping the child to learn self-management techniques. Sensory integration therapy stimulates the five senses in a regulated manner. The patient is assisted in effectively organizing the sensory information and interpreting it correctly.
The alertness is regulated with self-regulation techniques which helps the child to better concentrate on the task at hand. Programs exist for both adults and children alike.
As part of the intervention, the sensory input is managed along with the regulation of alertness levels. This helps the child to easily regain focus after a break and to help him or her maintain concentration during the day.
It is recommended that ADHD kids take part in physical activities such as organized sports. Sports provide an appropriate outlet for all that hyperactive energy.

Jenny McCarthy uses the biomedical approach for her son Ethan.


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Coping With Marriage and ADHD

The fact that ADHD adds to the stress in a household is no secret. Yet, one of the greatest gifts any child can receive is happily married parents. Children that grow up in happy homes are said to be better able to form friendships and romantic relationships. With the statistics surrounding ADHD and divorce being so gloomy, how can parents remain happily married?
1. Stop blaming - start acknowledging. When one parent is mainly dealing with the symptoms all day and all night, it is only natural that he or she will become resentful. The child has the condition and this has to be accepted, regardless of the causes and the circumstances. When parents move beyond the blame and accept the situation for what it is, they will be able to celebrate the child's unique personality.
2. Work as a team. It is hard work raising an ADHD child and there is often very little time that is not spent fighting the battles of bad behavior and other social issues. Parents should split responsibilities fairly, each working in some time every day to spend quality time with the child, even if it is for 15 minutes. Sometimes, an hour or two away from home may have the same stress-relieving result as a weeklong luxury cruise. Each partner should get to choose an activity they enjoy that can be enjoyed with the other partner. Spending time together helps to strengthen the bond between partners. However, a bit of "me-time" will also work wonders for an overwrought mother.
3. Appreciate each other. Mothers usually feel like they have to do all the hard jobs and being the bad cop to boot. Dad gets to play with the kids and do fun things, which usually makes him look like the good guy in their eyes. It is important for parents to acknowledge and say that they appreciate their partner's role in dealing with the teachers, the tantrums and the general management of the kids.
4. Be understanding. Finally, men use intimacy as a tool to relax, while the day's stresses could cause a mother to just want to sleep at the end of a long day. It is important for partners to understand and work together to make it fair and create a supportive environment for both partners.


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Coping Strategies for Parents With ADHD Kids

ADHD kids love to fiddle with things. Some have a compulsive need to play with something all the time. If something is not available, they will start pulling at their hair, their fingers or their toes.

These special children react well to having a special place in the home. This spot can be used for studying or as a quiet playing or reading area. Since hyperactive kids are unable to filter overstimulation, this area should be clear from clutter and too many colors. The corner should be painted in solid colors. The worktable should face a blank wall where the child can spend time concentrating and where there are no distractions.
When the child is doing homework, the room should be quiet. ADHD kids can most certainly not do homework in front of the television. The table should be cleared from everything else, but the tools needed to do a specific task.

Playmates should also be restricted to no more than two at a time. ADHD kids become excitable and overstimulated easily. It is also best to have them play at home. The rules should be explained to the playmate. It is a good idea to explain the reason for the rules to the other parent. It is a good idea for the host parent to be present and provide supervision and structure.

It is common for ADHD kids to fight with their friends when they become overstimulated or tired. The parent should plan for this eventuality by reading the signs, another benefit of hosting the playmates at home. When this happens, it is a good idea to distract the kids by offering an alternative activity which they can do quietly and independently together. This is not the time to engage them in a board game that will create more opportunity for discord. Rather choose an activity such as having them help prepare a meal, watching a nature show on television or drawing.


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Coping With an ADHD Child

Some parents say that dealing with an ADHD child is a nightmare. However, many people have experienced a marked improvement using some behavioral techniques. It is important to distinguish between punishment and behavioral therapy. When a parent becomes impatient with a child who cannot seem to manage basic and acceptable behaviors, the relationship can easily be tarnished.

A loving and supportive relationship is very important between the parent and the ADHD child. If the relationship is compromized, the child will probably become more difficult to handle. By this time, the management of the child will probably consist of punishment, which further damages the relationship. Instead, following a few simple guidelines will help to improve the relationship and in return the child's behavior.

1. Rules and discipline must be consistent. The child must have a clear understanding of the consequences of his or her actions and inactions. This will make certain that the child understands the behaviors that are unacceptable.

2. Anger is a common and understandable emotion for parents of an ADHD child. However, it should be controlled and parents should use a slow and quiet voice. Many of these children have an associated disorder, known as sensory integration dysfunction and shouting and screaming could make them react even worse.

3. Look for good behavior and praise the child for this. When praising the child, avoid bringing any negative behaviors into the equation. Don't say "It is good that you are playing quietly and not jumping around as usual." Rather say "I am proud of you playing so quietly." The child should know that they are loved, even when his or her behavior is not liked.

4. A clear routine helps to build security and confidence into a child's life. A timetable with times for play, homework, eating and relaxation can be placed in a spot where the child can find it. An ADHD child is bound to push the boundaries and sometimes he or she will not complete certain tasks on time. However, the parents should encourage them to stick to the routine as much as possible. ADHD kids are often forgetful and a routine will help him or her to get used to daily tasks and organization.

The organizational and behavioral skills an ADHD child learns will stand him or her in good stead in the future.


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How to Support Your ADD/ADHD Child at School

Young children are not geared to speak up for themselves especially when it comes to talking to teachers. In this instance parents are the go between for the children. Parents need to know what is going on in the lives of their children. For this reason, parents should be ready to listen to their children and the teachers so that all the information is at hand.
These communication sessions should be productive and constructive. Both parents and teachers need to be committed to what is best for the children. Both parties should communicate in a positive fashion and keep up a good attitude.
Good planning is always advised in these matters. Parents have the option to meet with school authorities even before the school year begins. Thereafter there should be monthly meetings in order for the ADD/ADHD school support strategy to be effective. Parents should honor times that have been set down to meet and they should never cancel a meeting if possible.
Ideally try to meet with the teacher in the classroom so that a sense of the learning environment can be experienced. Parents and teachers should establish mutually agreed upon goals with regards to the children. Once the goals have been documented, then a strategy should be put in place so that these goals can be achieved.
Parents should believe that the teacher has the children's hearts at interest. Even though some of the feedback may be uncomfortable, be prepared to listen attentively. Parents should not interrupt the teacher at all.
In order for ADD/ADHD school support strategy to be successful, information should be shared between the two parties. Exchanging information can be very beneficial in giving both parties a complete understanding about the situation and how children behave in the home and school environment. Tactics that both parties use on the children can be used to improve matters for children, parents and teachers alike.


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How to Cope With ADHD Symptoms in Your Child

Parents are able to cope with ADHD symptoms that their child may be experiencing. For this to happen, parents need to have a good understanding of how this condition affects children. Once this has been achieved then it is much easier to help the child achieve success at school or while being home schooled.

Many things distract these children and this includes noises, their own thoughts and passersby. It takes a significant amount of mental effort for these children to stay focused for any length of time. Although it seems as if the child is listening to the parents or the teacher this might not necessarily be the case.

Where the child is placed during learning time is important and seating them away from windows or doors can help this. 

Pets should be removed from the environment. Parents can break up the teaching sessions into shorter segments so that better focus is achieved. The child should be allowed to move often so that there is a break of state.

Information should be written and then stored where it is easily accessible to the child. Frequent breaks should be the norm and larger projects should be chunked down so that the child can manage the projects better. It is important to keep in mind that they have smaller attention spans than most other children.

Often children with this condition are unable to control their impulses. This will manifest by the child shouting out of turn often. Often this is done in a way that the child appears to be rude or aggressive. Be careful how this is addressed as these children often have a sensitive self-esteem. Chastising the child for this behavior in front of other people is not recommended, as it will only break the child down even further.

Parents should be open in their discussions about the problem with the affected child. The child must be clear on what behavior is acceptable and what is not acceptable and what consequences can be accepted if there is bad behavior. Parents can write all the acceptable and unacceptable behavior and the punishment for any transgressions. This will better help everyone to better cope with ADHD symptoms.


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Tips for Teaching Math and Reading to Your ADD/ADHD Child

Children with ADD/ADHD will have more fun if parents try to incorporate some fun when teaching math and reading. This will keep the child positive and motivated during these sessions. Songs, interesting trivia and using physical motion during the lesson are all strategies that will work well in helping to get the child to comprehend these subjects. The sessions will become fun and may even help in minimizing the symptoms of this condition.
These children tend to be what is referred to as concrete learners. They prefer to take part in the lesson and to hold or touch whatever it is that they are learning about. Games and objects are therefore extremely useful in getting the message of math across to these children. Most importantly it will bring an element of fun into the session. Associating fun with learning is a good strategy to adopt when trying to teach any child.
Dice, memory cards and dominoes can be used effectively for this purpose. Otherwise hiding or tucking fingers and toes away will also do the trick. Parents need to become creative with ways to deliver the message.
In terms of reading, parents can draw pictures to highlight words that are problematic. Pictures can also be used for certain math problems. Children can learn a lot by drawing items that need to be counted.
When dealing with the reading portion of teaching math and reading it is wise to act out the story with the child. Get the child to try and guess what might happen next. This strategy will get the child's imagination going and this can be a very stimulating experience.
Another strategy to adopt with regards to reading is make costumes that relate to the story for the child to wear during the lesson. This helps to bring a sense of reality about for the child. Strategies like this will help the child to retain what he or she has learned.


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The Amazing Benefits of Minerals for ADHD

It is no surprise that many people do not understand the value that minerals for ADHD has. All to often people are so caught up in the business of surviving that they miss some of the most important things that are happening around them. Hopefully parents who have children with ADD/ADHD will notice that there is something amiss with their child. Even if this is the case often they might not know what to do about it or worse not be dealing with it for the right reasons.

Once parents have identified the condition there is much that can be done on a holistic level to improve the quality of life for their child. While most parents understand the importance of vitamins, many are not aware of the power of minerals in a child's life. Today, there are insufficient amounts of minerals in food as the soil has been deprived of this much-needed nutrient.

Adding certain minerals to the child's diet can go a long way towards improving the situation. Some of these are iron, zinc, magnesium and calcium. Parents should find a good ionic version of these and add them to their child's diet right away.

Research has shown that children with this condition are iron deficient so this should be added to the diet. Zinc is instrumental in promoting good brain health. Many children with this condition are deficient in this much-needed nutrient as well. Magnesium helps to absorb calcium and also works on the nervous system while calming the child down. It is also good for good bone health. Calcium not only promotes good bone health, it also assists in the neurons in the body communicating with each other.

While many people like to give a combined vitamin and mineral tablet, it is suggested to take a concentrated form of mineral supplement. The tablet version of minerals is not as effective as much of it is lost in the absorption process. Liquid minerals that are ionic are much better. Once the parents have found the best option they can then focus on the right vitamins, which are equally important.

The vitamins that are best for this situation are vitamin B, vitamin C and the omega 3's. Vitamin B supports good brain activity and functioning. It is best to take a vitamin B complex. Vitamin C will help in reducing hyperactivity. Omega 3 is good for overall brain function. Many children are to be deficient in fatty acids. While many different foods contain the minerals and vitamins that everyone does need the quantities are insufficient for a variety of reasons and in the case of minerals for ADHD it is suggested that supplementation is rather taken so that the child is guaranteed of the optimum amounts of minerals and vitamins.